Under my blankets

Since yesterday morning I've been not feeling great -- not anything of note, just a sound-and-fury-signifying-nothing kind of illness -- but furious enough that I slept much of yesterday. I was cold, and couldn't warm up unless my three littles sat on me, and so they did. Straight across me as I lay on the couch, they indulged in far more TV than appropriate just so I could keep them close as heat sources. 

 Image via weathergirlshop

This is not a perfect plan. Human blankets:

• do not hold still to keep your toes covered just so
• will drop food crumbs on you
• will jump with no warning and your sore and tired body because The Electric Company theme song is just that exciting
• might poke you in the face just as you've fallen asleep because of a deep-seated excitement for possessing the vocabulary words "eye," "nose" and (other) "eye"
• are prone to digging in toes or elbows for primacy of their own comfort, not yours

But! Human blankets will:

• spontaneously kiss you and whisper sweet nothings like I love you more than bugs, Mama!
• force-feed share with you their beverages, only occasionally by sticking their sippy cup straws up your nose while you sleep
• drool/zerbert your back and explain it's to wash the yucky feelings away
• let you sleep all afternoon, as long as you awaken briefly every 27 minutes to retrieve a new show from On-Demand

It's not a perfect system, I admit. But it's not awful.

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